Exercise week 2

I really really liked the first week exercise that I did, so if you all still need recommendations that one is at the top of the list. A short list. :)
This week I chose something similar. It has a lot of different exercises targeted at different body parts, and I think it will be really great, and a bit of a step up.

This is again from http://backonpointe.tumblr.com/tagged/workout+challenge/page/10 Back on Pointe, one of the best sites I have seen for exercise routines that don't require a home gym.

I have no idea what a bridge is, but I am learning all kinds of new things with this.
Am I the only person that HATES SQUATS? I don't care how fit I am, I hate them. Hate hate hate them. But, I sure do like what they can do for your body, so I guess I am stuck with them.

Me...behind? Noooo way.

Don't be surprised by this folks. I am..how do you say...a procrastinator. And even though I am unemployed I feel this week has been really busy. Cross your fingers for me on an interview I had on Wednesday...I am really hoping to get that job!


So, we are going to start again. That is something about weight loss that I'm sure other people experience. I did really good for five days, then I didn't do good for two days----and that 8th day is where a downhill spiral can begin. Because in my mind, if I do bad for two days, I may as well eat what I want on day three. And if day 3 is bad, I may as well wait until the next Monday to start over. And if for some reason I have plans on Tuesday, then I might as well wait until the following Monday to do anything because I want to "start fresh" or "eat clean" (I think I will probably have a blog just about this. I have about a million rants about "eating clean" and "paleo".). I also have a terrible habit of punishing myself for eating poorly by (this is going to sound pretty messed up) eating even more poorly, and binging. Then, I feel disgusting and worthless, and that for some reason is a good way to teach myself not to do it. <-----this sentence is clearly not a healthy way to do anything, nor do I really believe in punishment for something as dumb as this, but that is how my brain works.
When I am not binging or hungry, I think normally. In the moment...its like I have gone completely insane. None of the habits I have related to food are rational.  I feel like this:

Now in terms of eating, I haven't really done that bad. I didn't get near the recipes made that I wanted to, but that is why I am writing this. To let all of you know that I am terrible at deadlines. lol.
I am going to pick a new exercise and post it, and I think I am going to make a recipe post with all 4 recipes I want to make for the week. Change is good, right?

So until next post, phantom readers. :)

Exercise panic

Yesterday, my legs felt like they were on fire. Have you ever woke up in the morning after a really good workout, you go to the bathroom to do the first thing everyone does when they wake up, and you sit down and feel like your legs are going to explode?

That was me yesterday. I knew that it wasn't a bad pain (injury), but I was TERRIFIED to do the squats that my workout required. I kept putting it off and putting it off, and finally around 8:30 I decided it was now or never.
The first set of squats were interesting to say the least...but by the time I got done with my workout I felt
900 times better. Then, I was mad at myself for waiting that long- if I would have done it at noon, I would have not looked like a 400 year old person walking around all day.
Lesson learned!!
And a quote from one of my favorite movies of all time, ever :)

Recipe 2

Well, this might be cheating,  but this is going to be my recipe for tomorrow:

http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=20662

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Ingredients

1 1/2 lb of boneless skinless chicken breast cut into large pieces
2 cans corn, drained
1 can black beans rinsed and drained
16oz salsa

 

Save Now

Directions

Add corn, black beans, and 4 oz of salsa to slow cooker. add chicken and pur remaining salsa on top. Cooks for 3-4 hours on high or 6 hours on low.

Number of Servings: 5

I am trying to use things I already have. I bought chicken on sale at Fareway (1.99 a pound!!!) and I have this amazing salsa and corn already. I am really excited for this!! And, I haven't used a crock pot in years. I am going to 1/2 the recipe--I don't really need 5 servings of anything. 

F You Sugar!!!!

I might struggle with the word addiction in terms of food in general, but when it comes to sugar...sign me up for anonymous meetings.

I feel absolutely powerless. I can stuff myself full of food, to the point where I think I am going to die when I get up, but even after that I STILL WANT SUGAR. I want cake. Cookies. Ice Cream. Muffins. Candy bars. I am like the cookie monster, but I want to make sure it has lots of sugar and carbs, so I am not nearly as picky as him.

Today the feeling hit me when I was in Wal-Mart. Cue the danger zone music, because I was on the highway to binging. Instead of getting the cookies that I wanted, and the bread, and the cakes, and the ice creams, and the bagels and cream cheese, I got sugar free hard candy. Not the best solution, but to me, better than going on a binge.

Going to do my exercise in a little bit, my thighs are ON FIRE right now though, so this should be interesting. Wish me luck!

Weird coincidences

Last night I decided to do a dry run on the exercise I picked out for this week to see if I could do it.
I also had to look up a few exercises and realized I'm pretty comfortable with the sets. What I wasn't prepared for was the soreness. I know that I didn't hydrate properly, so I'm working on that as we.
Today I made it through the exercises and I'm proud I did it.  That's the thing about exercising that I don't understand how I let myself quit. Even being sore it feels SO GOOD!!!! There is no better rush than a good workout.

As for the weird coincidences, there were two. First, the first blog I stumbled upon today was a lady who just posted last night about her true experiences with binging.
I read it and I was just in shock. Its good and scary to know that there are other people out there that binge and binge and feel just as powerless as I do. That lady now runs marathons, so there is a lot of hope. Her blog is here:
Www.runsforcookies.com
Interestingly enough, her name is Katie.

Second coincidence was just timing but I thought it was pertinent. I saw true life was on MTV (yes, I know, but I can't help it) and the focus of the episode was food addiction and the health consequences. I struggle with the word addiction because I think that when you attach a stigma like that people have a hard time relating and  understanding how truly awful it canBe. I also think that people don't take food addiction seriously because when compared to drug or alcohol addiction it seems minor.
I get that a little. I just know that if I felt more in control I don't think I would weigh what I do. I'm sure there will be plenty more on this throughout this journey :)

Finally, I'm using an app called ziplist from the play store for recipe shopping. It is pretty great so far, it even separates the ingredients into categories for easier shopping. Check it out!

First recipe

This seems like the first project I am going to tackle!

Doesn't that look amazing? Less than 400 calories a serving. I love Pinterest, because I found this website:
http://www.skinnytaste.com/2012/02/cajun-chicken-pasta-on-lighter-side.html

I imagine you will see lots of reposts from this site, I'm excited to have found it.




As an update, YUM!!! I made this recipe and it was delicious. I did some minor substitutions. I used Wacky Mak for the noodles (I can't decide if that hindered the dish or not...may want to stick with linguine) and I left out the tomatoes. Still really really good! And the serving size was 1.5 cups- that doesn't seem like a lot, but it filled a small plate and I felt satisfied. I also have about four other meals for the week. Definitely thumbs up on this one!! As soon as I can get my picture uploaded I will.

Week 1 exercise

So, for week one, here is the exercise I will do Monday through Saturday.

Here is the link to the website this came from:
http://backonpointe.tumblr.com/tagged/workout+challenge/page/2


Its called backonpointe, which obviously is for dancers, but there are a lot of great exercises on this site. For now I am going to focus on exercises that don't require any special equipment.
I also need to figure out what plie squats are before tomorrow. lol.

I'm scouring Pinterest right now to find recipes, I will post them soon.

Me, then and now

I've been heavy all of my adult life, and a lot of my teen years. Mostly due to compulsive eating. I have had some pretty heavy eating disorders, and done a lot of awful things to my body, both while losing and gaining weight.
I've sadly ridden the bulimia train (trying to lose weight for a boyfriend who was mildly ok with me being bigger, but it was comments from his mom that sent me into a spiral) and starved myself as well.
My goal this time is obviously to do it the right way-- diet and exercise.

To give you an idea of how quickly I can gain weight, these two pictures are from July and October of 2011.

This picture is from April of this year.

 Perhaps you notice a difference? If anyone out there is reading this, and you can relate, I deeply feel for you.  Its not as if I don't know what I need to do to lose weight and be healthy...its more that it is SO HARD.
Many people assume that if you have done it once, it should be easy from there on out. I think it gets harder.
Some people can eat bad for a day, and it doesn't affect them. I can eat bad for a day and gain 2 pounds. I wish I was joking.

Now, if only I could figure out photoshop so I could paste my face on a healthy fit woman to have an idea of what I am going for, but for now we will just use our imaginations.


Until then, find me on facebook:  www.facebook.com/tateebee

Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/tateebee/

And of course, twitter(although be prepared, my twitter isn't the most PC thing in the world) @katiemc4

I never finish anything! But I'm hoping to change...

There is a possibility I won't even finish this post!


But let me start from the beginning.


I'm Katie. I'm from a small town in Iowa, and I have a lot of dreams, and goals. I also have a lot of unfinished projects...but the project that I am taking on in this blog is me.
You see, I'm that girl. The big girl that has a ton of friends, and seems really happy, but hides in her room and eats more than anyone should ever eat in one sitting. I am that girl that over the years has lost hundreds of pounds, and then gained them all back, sometimes gaining more than I lost in the first place.
Can you relate?
Two years ago, I hired a personal trainer, and lost almost one hundred pounds. Fast forward to now, and I think (I am avoiding scales) I have gained most of that weight back. Then, I could afford to spend thousands of dollars on a personal trainer, (which, if you have the money, I highly recommend. Its worth it.) but now I cannot. So I am getting creative and trying to give it a go in a more unusual way.

The point of this blog is not only to get healthy, but use some of the things that most people consider time wasters to my advantage. Pinterest has been an obsession of mine since my dear friend Leanne introduced me to it about a year and a half ago (yep, I was cool before all of you!! :)) I have a board on Pinterest called fitnow, with tons of tips and tricks and recipes and...well, anything that you could need to get healthy and stay that way. Funny thing about that board on Pinterest is that I pin and repin things to it, but until today(well, tomorrow) I have never used any of the things I have pinned. Not one recipe, not one exercise.

Tomorrow, that is going to change. My goal (and have mercy, that this be a goal I finish) is to use 4 recipes and 1 exercise regimen from Pinterest per week. For full disclosure, I plan on throwing some Zumba and Insanity (if I get fit enough) in there, as well as some C25k. But I will make four recipes and follow for six days an exercise post from Pinterest, and see how well it goes. I will also post links, and give credit to the original posters and bloggers, but I will update my experiences so that if there are any of you out there looking for inspiration, maybe I can give it to you. Maybe you can help me!

The thing about weight loss, and gain, especially for me is that I get to the point where everyone starts to notice how great I look, and then some big change happens (in this last case, a new job and a bad breakup) and I forget all about healthy eating and working out. I'm convinced I gain weight back faster than anyone I have ever met.

I don't know about you, but I feel sorry for my friends and family when I am gaining. Heads up out there, skinny friends: I know that you notice. And I love each and every one of you for not judging me for it. I love that all of you love me unconditionally and don't care that I gained back all the weight I worked so hard to lose. Its such an uncomfortable situation really-- I know my friends and family care that I am healthy, but I know that they also want me to be happy, and are absolutely (probably) terrified to mention that I am back where I started.

Imagine being a close friend of mine. I spend thousands of dollars losing weight, donate all my "fat" clothes, really believe in myself...and then boom. I'm right back into old habits and who wants to tell their friend that they look awful?

Enough negative though, folks, because this is going to be a positive start. I'm going to post a lot of anecdotes, and more about myself, so that everyone can get a sense of what I really hope to accomplish.
Thanks for reading, and read my next post for all of my contact info and pictures!!


Katie